Hi Ginger,
I think your metaphors could be customized but not to worry,
You cracked me up with:
"I wasn’t referring to his wife as hippopotamus....
Because of my troll-chimp nature, I added that she is rather hippy"
Thanks for the early morning humour, it is a good way to start the day.
Added:
Also, if you think Gino's avatar looks like a hipppo, even when little, then perhaps you should go get your eyes tested :)